SynopsisA woman called Darling is hired to house sit at a fancy, old, big haunted house in the middle of New York City. As she spends her days alone, she figures out the house’s ghostly past and slowly succumbs to the madness of the house’s, and her own, lore.ReviewI first watched this movie back in high school and thought it was the epitome of slow burn, creepy, woman-goes-insane horror films. As I have a lot more horror movie experience now (and film experience in general), I realize that this is basically a rip off of Repulsion (1965). This isn’t to say it’s a bad movie by any means; the many jump cuts and jump scares keep you on your toes (it could be argued that there are too many of these quick scenes), and there is an overall eerie feeling that is hard to shake once you finish. But, it’s not the best movie of a woman going insane. There are plenty of those, horror or not, that execute the trope a lot better than this one did. The first act is boring as all hell but the second … [Read more...] about Darling (2015) Review with Jordyn Wilson
The Substance Review
SynopsisThe Substance follows Elisabeth Sparkle, a big time celebrity host of an 80s workout tv show, who turns 50 years old and gets sacked in pursuit of someone younger and “hotter” to host the show. After getting in a car crash, she meets a mysterious stranger who tells her about the substance, which can create a younger, more beautiful, better version of yourself. Lizzie decides to go through with this, and the results change the rest of her life forever.ReviewThis movie is a doozy. It’s fun and stylistic and seemingly poses an important question about misogyny in Hollywood, women not being allowed to age, the emphasis on beauty no matter how painful, etc, but the commentary falls flat. In Coralie Fargeat’s first film, Revenge, I noticed a very similar occurrence. There is potential in The Substance for important discussions, but it turns into an extremist monster-esque chaotic clusterfuck instead of really giving us some answers, or at least worthwhile commentary. The film is more … [Read more...] about The Substance Review
Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Review
SynopsisBeetlejuice Beetlejuice picks up thirty years after the events of the first film, with Delia Deetz being a famous artist, Lydia having her own ghost adventures type show, and her daughter Astrid being a goth angsty teen. The Deetz family has to deal with the sudden loss of the paternal figure in their lives while also grappling with their own individual battles. When Astrid, played by Jenna Ortega, gets stuck in the afterlife and Beetlejuice’s ex wife Delores, played by Monica Belluci, starts stalking him, Lydia makes another glorious deal with Beetlejuice to save her daughter and get Monica Belluci off Beetlejuice’s back. Chaos ensues.ReviewAs I’ve said many times, I am not a big fan of sequels. I was not very excited to see this, since it is a sequel so many years after the first I figured it was another cash grab. That very well might be true, but I unexpectedly had a really fun time watching this. Michael Keaton soars as the titular character once again, and with this star … [Read more...] about Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Review
Trap Review
SynopsisTrap is a movie that follows Cooper, a seemingly normal dad who takes his daughter, Riley, to her favorite artist’s concert. Once there, Cooper is told that the whole concert is a trap to catch a serial killer who is colloquially called The Butcher. Plot twist (but not a plot twist because it is given in the trailer) is that Cooper is the Butcher, and he needs to find a way to escape the heavily guarded arena without getting caught.ReviewI was very excited for this movie, I thought the trailer looked awesome and M Night has some good hits (The Visit, Signs, obviously The Sixth Sense). After about fifteen minutes of pure concert, I was completely checked out. This movie is boring, it is unfulfilling, the trailer gives away most of the interesting plot. Even though a serial killer trying not to get caught while surrounded by SWAT teams and the FBI is really high stakes, the movie doesn’t make that apparent whatsoever. The classic ending “twist” that M Night always does falls flat … [Read more...] about Trap Review
Grave Encounters Review
SynopsisGrave Encounters follows a Zak Baggins/Ghost Adventures type crew while they film their first season of the titular show, constantly in search of new scares and not afraid to create their own for movie magic. They go to stay at an abandoned mental hospital in Maryland, where they get locked inside for 8 hours in hopes of getting some good footage and getting the hell out of there. Not expecting to see anything out of the ordinary, they are in for more than they bargained for.Review of Grave EncountersThis is a very fun movie. There’s plenty of things to laugh at throughout to relieve you from the unexpected jump scares of ghouls and goblins. It’s not as serious and dreadful as something like Paranormal Activity, but it’s not trying to be something like that. They don’t waste much time getting into the nitty gritty of how haunted the asylum really is. The pacing is good and the scares are effective even on a repeat watch. The main problem I have with this movie is that the end … [Read more...] about Grave Encounters Review
1408 Review
Synopsis1408 is a film that follows Mike Enslin, played by John Cusack, a corny horror novelist who specializes in writing about the scariest, spookiest places he’s ever been. Although he spends a lot of time in “haunted” places, he has never seen any paranormal activity and does not believe in ghosts. He then receives a cryptic postcard from the Dolphin Hotel in New York City that states, “Don’t stay in 1408.” Intrigued by this gesture and not at all deterred, he goes against the wishes of the postcard and of the staff of the hotel and books the room, hoping to finally get scared.ReviewThis is the ultimate sleeper pick. This movie is not very well known or well talked about in horror movie communities, to my knowledge anyway, and after a second viewing I firmly believe this is one of the best horror movies. The viewer is never bored, stuff happens so quickly and so often in this film that it was extremely difficult to take notes on it because I almost always missed something. The … [Read more...] about 1408 Review
Perfect Blue Review
SynopsisPerfect Blue follows the story of Mima, a pop star who turns her life around to become an aspiring actress. As she goes deeper into her role on a crime thriller tv show, she realizes that someone might be stalking her. The line between reality and acting becomes thinner and thinner as the anxiety of fame and her potential stalker rise.ReviewThis movie is impeccable. Director Satoshi Kon forces the viewer to descend into Mima’s madness by blurring the line between real and fantasy throughout the course of the film with quick cuts, disorienting scenes, and an overall sense of unknowingness. Making an anime horror film be this good, this widely received and revered is no easy feat, but Kon makes it look like a cake walk. This is one of my favorite movies of all time, and one of my favorite directors of all time. The sense of dread, doom, and anxiety get bigger and bigger until it all comes to a head at the end of the movie. It is emotional, thrilling, scary, and hard to follow, … [Read more...] about Perfect Blue Review
The Strangers Chapter 1 Review
SynopsisA couple embarks on a journey across the country for their five year anniversary. After their car breaks down in the middle of nowhere Oregon, they have no choice but to stay in a cabin in the woods. When Ryan, played by Froy Gutierrez, runs back into town to grab something he forgot out of his car, Maya played by Madeline Petsch starts hearing and seeing strange things in the cabin, almost like someone else is in the house.Review of The Strangers Chapter 1I really hated this movie. Like, really hated. I didn’t really know what to expect, but taking what didn’t work from the original and even at some points taking direct lines and situations from the original and cramming it into the already too long 90 minute run time was atrocious. I don’t know if I was just tired, but I almost fell asleep at multiple points due to boredom. At the beginning of the movie, there is text on screen that says this movie will show us one of the most brutal crimes committed in America. I will tell … [Read more...] about The Strangers Chapter 1 Review
Tarot (2024) Review
SynopsisA group of friends rent a mansion to celebrate one of their birthdays and run out of alcohol. In their search around the house for more booze they stumble upon an old hand painted tarot deck and Haley, the friend who can read tarot cards, reads all of their horoscopes. Then chaos ensues as they start being killed one by one by the embodiment of the ruling cards in their individual readings.ReviewThis movie isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever seen but it is also not very good. I did like the costumes and effects of the tarot card creatures, there were a few funny lines (and by a few I mean two), but the script and acting was definitely lacking, leading it to be predictable and a bit silly in a bad way. I was worried that this movie was going to be very offensive toward tarot as a whole, but it took a different direction than I had originally thought, but it still wasn’t perfect either. I wasn’t fully entertained, I scoffed at a lot of moves the characters made, but I wasn’t … [Read more...] about Tarot (2024) Review
Tales From the Darkside: The Movie Review
SynopsisThis movie, directed by John Harrison, is based off the TV series of the same name. It follows a wraparound story about a kid that is going to be cooked by a woman who kidnapped him, and he tries to get out of it by telling her stories from the titular book. This movie is an anthology, with one wraparound story and three tales from the darkside, filled with frights, fun, blood, and gore.Review of Tales From the Darkside: The MovieThis movie is very 1990. The style, the gore remind me of late 80s early 90s horror. I have never seen the TV show, but I can see how this film could be nostalgic to those who grew up in the 80s and had a knack for horror movies. It’s always a hit or a miss when a TV show becomes a movie, but in this case, I think it is a romp. It’s fun, the gore is good, but it’s not very scary. With a 93 minute runtime and a star studded cast, I don’t think you could go very wrong with this movie. With all anthologies though, there are going to be stories within the … [Read more...] about Tales From the Darkside: The Movie Review